Anyone who has been in a relationship with a person with a Narcissistic Personality disorder would know how utterly selfish and ruthless they can get. They want the other person to be complete in their control. And the driving factors behind this complex are varied. Some of them are –
1) They are shameless
It is not like they are somehow not able to relate shame with their actions. It is not like shame is entirely absent from their life. Just that they are unable to process this shame is a manner which is healthy and organic. Not expressed or vented in the proper manner, it just begets more problems and thus starts the endless loop of despicable acts and the inability to process them and thus more such acts in frustration.
2) They think they are beyond reproach
Narcissists truly believe that they are above and beyond themselves. In psychological terms, this is known as magical thinking. They have such a distorted version of themselves inside their head that they can’t even process their own shortcomings. Instead, they project these on other people.
3) They are extremely arrogant
If they ever get off their high horse, they start feeling restless and are at a great unease. The only way for them to feel better about themselves is to degrade and debase someone else.
4) They are jealous
In a bid to prove that they are better than everyone else, they try to make others envious of themselves. This is just another way they are projecting their own insecurities onto others.
5) They feel they are entitled to everything the world has to offer
Because they are disillusioned into thinking they are somehow superior than everyone else, they also expect the world to treat them as such. As long as everyone is ready to be on their beck and call they are happy. As soon as someone digresses, they immediately point them out as a ‘difficult’ or unreasonable person. They take noncompliance as an attack on their supposed superiority. This threatens their bubble of illusion. This kind of behavior might also trigger their narcissism driven rage.
6) They don’t care about the feelings of others and have no remorse about exploiting others
This is the reason they are the worst kind of people to be in a relationship with. They think the world of themselves and expect you to do the same. Your worth and existence is solely limited to how useful you are to them. Their abuse starts with just mental abuse but can progress to other forms as well. They do not care about the happiness or even the mental peace of the other person. The only thing that matters to them is that everything should be as it suits them.
7) They have no idea about boundaries
They feel they have a freehold on the other person and their life. As mentioned above, the existence of anyone close to them is important only up to the point where it can be used to serve them in one way or the other.